your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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