so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize
