oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize