return my video game
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
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