ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
