She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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