what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
