just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize
