After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
we made out on top of his cat.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
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