We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
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