You just made me feel so damn special
I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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