I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
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