This is the worst date ever. Pls kill me. No, wait, scratch that, stick to the original plan of killing Paris Hilton, I'll live though this
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
I'd cum for enchiladas.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
My Sexting was not on an AP level
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
