I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
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