i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Randomize
