That's intense
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
Randomize