Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
Randomize
