If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
Randomize
