all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
Holy shit, Uber is testing a service to summon an ice cream truck.
Bring me the penis of the founder so I may endlessly fellate him. Or cunnalinge. I don't discriminate.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
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