I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Randomize