if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
bring money and cleavage
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
Randomize
