No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Randomize
