Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Randomize
