Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize