i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
