were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Randomize
