soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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