well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
