They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
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