Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize
