I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Randomize
