Imagine two people making love on top of a unicorn . . . my life is the opposite of that.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
Randomize
