Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Someone shit on the floor
Xanax induced break ups are the best. Since I'm a professional fiancee, I'm going to break up with them on Xanax from now on. It didn't hurt one tiiiiiny bit.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Randomize
