Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
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