why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
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