there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
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