There was a ginger baby in the car next to me. I almost totaled my car into the center divide.
I tried to assassinate the ginger baby
There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Congratulations! We have a period
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
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