the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Randomize
