why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
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