she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
Randomize
