check it out our google latitudes are spooning
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
Randomize
