I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
