She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
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