dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
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