so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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