She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize