I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
I just found a voice recording from Tanya's bachelorette party when we found you drunk in downtown being harassed by a crazy dude dressed like a clown and we rescued you. Attached is a voice recording of me interviewing you after we found you. I titled it Carlos Batman.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
