I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Randomize
