Can i not drive my cunt home
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
i out mim tonsoeep
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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