My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize