don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
Oh god it's open bar.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
Randomize
